Saturday, December 12, 2009

Tips For Guys II

I have returned from the world of, well, the world. I have seen guys that know what they're doing, and I've seen guys that haven't the faintest clue of what is going on. Both can be learned from. Our goal is to keep you from becoming the creepy guy that only thinks that girls like him.

Tip 3: If you are "creative" in any way, share it.

Recently, I've been talking to a guy that writes poetry. I don't mean the 'Roses are red' kind of poetry, but heart felt and truly from his heart poems. I absolutely love it. He showers me with his words and I swoon. It may just be because I'm a word person that this is a good thing, but It doesn't stop at poetry.

Guys, you have talents. Being creative isn't just something to be left to us girls, you have a place in the creative world as well. If you're an artist, paint/draw/sketch a painting. Do you sing? Women love guys that will sing for them. Do you knit? (Come on guys, we know you're out there. Stop trying to pass that sweater off as your mother's handy work.) Knit that girl a fucking pair of socks!

The only thing to remember when taking on this endeavor, is that you need to let it come from your heart. Girls can tell if there is emotions and sincerity in such things. If you are being anything but sincere, we'll smell you out and burn you on a pyre. Just so you know. So don't fake this stuff, its not worth it. Just be honest about why you're doing it.


Tip 4: Girls are not the only clingy ones.

I knew another guy, that became clingy fast. The worst part is that from the beginning he said that he didn't want anything serious. It wasn't but two weeks of talking to him after that, that he looked me in the eyes and said "I really like you a lot." Whoa there! Those are pretty serious words. The fact that there was a "I don't want anything serious" conversation previously, makes it confusing.

Did that conversation just get negated? It would have been easy to forget and move on, if he didn't want to see me all the time after that. It's an awful feeling of having to hide from someone, or make up excuses. I'm not that kind of person, I'm also not the kind of person to hurt someone else.

This guy of course, was sent packing. Clingy guys only work for clingy girls.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Before I turn 21...

I would really like to do all of these things before I turn 21.... If at all possible.

Before I turn 21:

· Have sex with both genders
· Smoke pot
· Learn to shoot a gun
· Get my license to own a gun
· Live in an apartment
· Skinny dip
· No “adult” road trip
· Purchase something from an “adult” store
· Do a shot
· Make a sex tape
· Get a tattoo
· Get a piercing somewhere other than my ears
· Sing onstage (not in a play)
· Finish the first draft of a book
· Play the lottery
· Learn to drive a stick-shift
· See a band I love in concert
· 24 hour movie fest
· One night stand
· Clift dive
· Own really expensive shoes
· Spend a week in Florida
· Use a tanning bed
· Use an entire roll of duck tape in one day
· Get a Brazilian wax
· Go to the Burning Man festival
· Vacation in Hawaii
· Have a complete spa day
· Go to a Rocky Horror show
· Sale my artwork to strangers
· Have “public” sex
· Visit Mexico
· Go to Mardi Gras
· One whole day of nothing but making love
· Nude beach

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Tips For Guys (because you need them)

Alright, male species, listen up. I've found that no matter how smooth you operate, you still need a few pointers. You still do some stuff that mystifies women. Stuff that I'm sure you don't even realize that you do. I intend, with this lovely little post, to help you transition into an even smoother Casanova.

Tip 1: No one knows you're interested unless you make a move.
Now, this should be a no brainer, but I see guys make this mistake all the time. Guys sometimes expect a girl to just realize that he's interested in her. While talking to a girl and flirting are good first steps, if you don't follow through and talk to her more than once or twice, she'll either think that you lost interest or had none to start with.

Tip 2: There is more to making the first move than just introducing yourself.
While making your interest known is a very important part, keeping up communication with said girl is an even bigger step. Like stated earlier, talking to her once or twice just doesn't cut it. Most girls are still in the mode of "I want him to make the first move." The part that we leave out of this statement is that there is more than one first move.

Somewhere between the invention of the computer and iPods, the female definition of "the first move" evolved. Yes, we expect you to introduce yourself to us, but we also expect you to ask for our number, find us on facebook, be the first to text us (this includes not just once, but being the first to text for the first few days), call us before we even think about calling you, and be the first to ask us on dates.

Girls worry about this stuff. We're afraid that if we're the first to do any of these things, that it'll scare guys away. All because we've been taught that guys make the first move. We don't want to be seen as clingy or as if we'd get attached/involved too fast.

But if the guy doesn't act soon, girls have a pattern they'll follow. First they'll wonder if they picked up on the wrong signals. They'll ask all their friends what they think, over analyzing every exchange that passed between her and the guy.

Next, depending on the advice of her friends (which is normally along the lines of "If he hasn't called/texted/ facebooked you by now, then he isn't interested. You can do better anyway.") She’ll go through a period of dressing her absolute best, taking more time than normal to make herself look good. She'll do this in an attempt to make herself feel better about the guy not calling. But also in the secret attempt that if she does see him that he'll remember why he talked to her in the first place.

After this brief period (and it's always brief, cause it take way too much energy to look your best every single day) she'll move on. Exhausted from looking her best every day, and determined that the guy wasn't worth it to begin with, she'll then return to her previous way of life. The way of life that doesn't include a guy that doesn't know the new first move rules.

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Tip two took more time than I thought it would. I'll come back later with more tips. Maybe one time per post next time? Just maybe.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

A small update

A small update so that you don't think I'm dead


animated picture

Friday, September 25, 2009

September 25th of 2009

Last night, after my near sleep deprived post, I decided to stay up even later and watch a movie. Now, it wasn't like I was starting from the very beginning. I had started the movie before Chrissy had came over, and while not being in the "very middle" of it, I was well into what I'd consider the first act of the movie.

The movie (which had been purchased earlier for only a dollar thanks to Chrissy, who is the absolute best) was Milk. You know, the movie based on the true story of Harvey Milk, the first openly gay man elected to major public office? That movie, I'm sure you're remembering now. The one with Sean Penn (and my favorite movie hottie James Franco).

I just got to say that I loved this movie. It gave me warm fuzzies, even when it made me cry. In case you were wondering how much I cried, it was 3 times. I count that as a good movie sign. The other emotion evoked was one of "grr." I really wanted to jump into the movie (or the past, if I really wanted results) and beat some ass. Which is strange for me, since I'm a pacifist I normally don't intensely feel the need to hurt people.

Anyway, go buy the movie if you don't own it. If you've never seen it? Speed dangerously in a car to you're nearest movie retailer, don't walk, to get this movie. You are missing out.

Because I stayed up to watch this movie last night, I didn't go to sleep till... close to, if not past, 3 this morning. So waking up at 8:30 was just a bit of a challenge. I love the weekend so much cause it means I can sleep end. Kind of... well, most of the time.

Okay, when you buy/watch Milk, don't stay up till 3 doing so. This advice comes in really handy if you have classes the next day. Are we clear on this? We are? Good, moving on.

Recently I decided that I'm changing. Not just as a person, that would be cliche and stupid. No, everyday I'm different. I mean, like the song says "You're hair never falls in quite the same way, and your clothes never wear as well the next day." I think that says it all right there.

With this development of self, I decided that I had the need to document this. I made plans to just use my camera to take a picture of myself EVERYDAY for the rest of my life. Then I decided that I was way too lazy for this. Knowing the the internet provides everything (expect Milk, that you're still going to have to buy at a store, cause an electronic copy isn't as fun as an actual DVD), I went to Google to find something to supplement my needs.

This is the story of how I found www.Flickaday.com. This site is pretty handy. It knew that I wanted to do nothing but take a picture of myself everyday for the rest of my life. So I set up an account to do just that. So far, I've been faithful to update and take a picture everyday. Just like I've been faithful to post a blog on here everyday. ...One day at a time....

Just one more topic I want to talk about, and then I'll let you go back to you're life that I'm sure would have been truly empty without reading this. The weather. I know, this is a very stupid topic, but hear me out.

The weather has been insane lately. Like, does mother nature not know that it's autumn? That It's supposed to be getting into jacket and long-sleeved t-shirt weather? It has felt more like the middle of July recently than the end of September.

Then there's the rain. This kind of rain, is more of a spring May/April rain. None of this is weather for this time of year. If you have ever doubted global warming, I think you've been given the proof. Al Gore can stop giving lectures about how it's real and just move on to how to stop it now.

Alright guys, that concludes the the list of topics that I had made for this blog (see I really do care about the blog, I made a list and everything). If you have topics you want me to talk about, just suggest them. If I find them relevant, I'll probably give them a go. Other wise I'll just keep talking about my life. Which is why you read my blog anyway, so I mean, don't expect too much else.

September 24th of 2009

For the past two nights, Christina has ended up in my room late at night. She doesn't stay all night, well she hasn't yet but she's yet to leave tonight. Hilarity ensues whenever we're together. I have a head massager that brings insane pleasur with one end (really guys, it looked like a reject whisk but is actually heaven), while the other end brings pointy death. Since Christina has a way of.... poking me, I had to have a weapon. She now has a cut that she blames on me. I believe that I'm innocent.

Samantha came to visit us today. It was a pleasant enough gathering. It was good to see her after close to four months of her absence.

I don't really think I've been interesting these past two days. I fail at life I guess you could say. Well, I've failed at the past two days at least. Being sleepy may have something to do with this as well...

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Curing A Bad Day

Today had so much promise. My morning class was canceled, so I got in an extra hour of sleep (which is always a good thing). My classes today weren't really all the bad, but I kept feeling like crap. I still feel like crap actually.

It's not in a sick, I should see a doctor kind of crap, but more along of it's just been an off day. I guess it's just being an "adult" has caught up with me. It would be nice to have a day to just be a little kid every once in a while.

In other news:

I made a cake today. Stealthily done in my dorm room. Now, I'm not going to claim being a fabulous culinary mind to know how to utilize dorm room microwaves to make a nice layer cake. No, I cheated. I made a Betty Crocker mini delight cake thing. It was by far, the best thing about my day.

You'd think that I'd be staying away from any kind of desserts after my last episode that only happened Sunday. Since I'm assuming you weren't there internet world, I'll recount the insanity of my actions.

It was a wonderful Sunday, birds were literally singing. You can't get more picture-esq than that, I tell you. I had already ate two bowels of chili for dinner (thanks mom, I really did love it), when my friend informs me that She hasn't ate dinner yet. Not to let her eat alone (cause that's a fate worse than death on campus) I offered to go with her.

That was a mistake. When faced with chocolaty desserts, I'm a sucker. My friend is also an enabler. When trying to decided between the desserts, she urged me to have both. Best friend ever, right? For all intent and purposes, she is. Just not when it comes to chocolate.

So yes, I've drown my bad day in a chocolate cake. I don't think you should blame me for it. Because it was a damn good cake.